Mother Daughter Talk

Had an unplanned conversation with my 17 yr old daughter last night. She had just come home and had come to my room to discuss her plans for the rest of the week.

Per usual, I asked where she would be going, with whom, what time, parents, phone numbers, etc. (Listen, I know in a few months she is off to college and I won’t know these details but she’s still a minor under my roof and I am a mom). She provided me with the required information and I felt comfortable with her plan.

I then did what many moms do.

I said she could go as long as she promised to finish up her “to do” list which included completing her course selection for the fall (she had only put in her cores) and setting up a virtual meeting with her new college advisor.

She agreed.

I then told her that although her college advisor might be well meaning and know a lot about the school, they would not know who she is as a person. And that she should take their advice, mull it over, then make her own decision.

I reminded her of her high school advisor who advised her to apply to only a certain group of schools because “they matched her skill set”. And that it was I who added top rated schools to her application because I knew she was capable.

I then told her of how her older brother was advised to take less courses as a freshman in college than others. And that I added the courses to his list because I knew he was capable.

I told her of how as a child I was advised that I could not be a doctor but if I worked hard I could be the secretary in a doctors office. And that my mom told me never to let anyone define me, I could be anything I wanted to be.

So I summarized to her by repeating those words. “Don’t let anyone define you. You can be anything you want to be.”

She nodded her head in agreement.

She is NYU bound.

Her brother is a rising university junior with a 3.6 GPA.

And I not only got my MD but added an MPH and MBA to those initials.

Know your worth.